Chapter 127

“What?”

“You’re living your life, and you have proper parents, a good job, friends, and colleagues.”

“They’re things you could have too.”

“But you won’t be able to regain respect for people.”

“….”

He was busy pouring out the anger that burst out day after day.

So he thought about wanting to live a proper life, but he couldn’t bring himself to try.

He had hated people for a very long time.

The parents who should have taught him love cheated, one died in an accident, and the other chose death on their own.

The world he saw after enlisting, because he hated himself and the world, was even more terrible.

Wars started for profit, and to survive, people wished for the death of the opposing side.

So Johan couldn’t stop hating.

All the filthy things that existed in the world were so horrific he couldn’t endure them.

Then he met a girl.

“I don’t want to hurt anymore.”

A girl who lost her sight from her parents’ abuse and tried to run far away because she hated the world.

The goodwill that such a child showed without fear became the last hope he could trust, and like the final stronghold of the world Johan had lived in.

“I wish bad people would disappear. I hope people would be less unhappy.”

When the girl died, he became Red Shadow, living on hatred.

Then he met Giselle.

A woman who lived clinging to the darkness of the city but struggled to keep her conscience.

He had his eyes taken by that woman, came to like her, and fell in love, and Johan gained another chance.

A chance to stop hating and learn to love.

‘Giselle….’

She ran away after abandoning him, but even so, as long as he has her, that’s enough.

Then he can shake off all his anger and hatred.

Click.

Tristan opened a new can of beer. He handed one to Johan and opened his own.

“Stop drinking so much.”

“Can’t I drink on a day like this? This much won’t get me drunk.”

When Johan shook his head in disgust, Tristan chuckled and chewed on snacks.

At least that’s a relief.

His face looked a lot more relaxed than before.

“I’m going to quit soon.”

“If you quit, how are you going to make a living? I saw three debt collection notices at your apartment.”

“Can you pretend you didn’t see those… never mind. What’s the point of telling a guy with no friends?”

“It’s not that I couldn’t make friends. I chose not to.”

“Ah, sure.”

Johan frowned. “You don’t believe me.”

“Have some conscience.”

The people he met at private school were all connected in one way or another.

The grandson of a parent’s godfather, the great uncle’s younger brother’s third-generation descendant, and so on.

Since both he and the others belonged to the inner circle, they couldn’t help but know each other’s circumstances well.

The parents who ran wild and their miserable deaths.

Pity was like a stain that wouldn’t wash away.

Even if you boasted high achievements, it clung to you, and at times became a weapon the other person could use.

Like saying, ‘Since you don’t have parents, you should at least be good at something.’

Thinking of the misery he felt as a child, Johan poured the rest of his beer down his throat.

“Tristan Lindbergh. I hope you remain someone who can cry.”

One person breaking was enough.

Johan lightly clinked his can against Tristan’s.

He doesn’t enjoy drinking, but today it wasn’t bad.

***

Johan appeared in my dream.

I was so happy to see him that even in reality, I was smiling.

“…I miss you.”

I woke up, pulled the blanket over my head, and closed my eyes.

I wanted to feel the happiness I’d just felt again.

I tried to gather the lingering afterimage, but the more I tried, the more it scattered like smoke.

My heart felt hollow, then cold.

Even when I try not to think of Johan, whenever I have a moment, I end up thinking of him several times a day.

“Falling in love with my enemy from a past life. Sounds like a movie protagonist.”

If I’d regained my memories before Johan took my hand at the terrorist site, would I still have come to like him?

“…I would have.”

Because in the face of death, I was powerless, afraid, and completely alone.

The warmth offered to me in that moment was too overwhelming.

Unable to bear the emptiness, I wiped at the corners of my eyes.

“No. That’s enough.”

Slap. Slap!

I lightly slapped both cheeks and kicked off the blanket as I got up.

I had to move quickly to pack sandwiches before going to the beach with Nelson.

I washed up in a hurry and was about to leave with Nelson when the phone rang. It was the landlady.

— Jean. About installing the security bars. It might take a while. There’s a flood of requests in the neighborhood these days, so the schedule’s backed up.

“How many days will it take?”

— They say it won’t be possible until about two weeks from now.

“Alright. Then I’ll expect it in two weeks.”

After ending the call, I packed my things neatly into my bag.

I planned to stay at a hotel until the security bars were installed.

It felt like another kind of escape, and it reminded me of the past when I ran away from Raphael.

If I had chosen something other than running back then, would I be living a different future now?

After moving my things to the hotel first, I met Mandy and Noah.

“The clothes Nelson’s wearing, you bought them at the shopping center last time, right?”

“They fit well. If he grows bigger, he won’t be able to wear them.”

While getting advice from Mandy, who had experience raising dogs, we arrived at the beach.

The beach behind the lighthouse, after walking quite a distance, was smaller and prettier than I expected.

Even though it was just a slightly different location, the seawater looked subtly brighter.

“Wow!”

I quickly took off my shoes.

I ran barefoot toward the sea.

When the waves covered my ankles, the cold made my body shiver.

Nelson tried to run away from the incoming waves, whining as he struggled, and I burst out laughing.

Not just the absence of terrorism, but being able to laugh like this felt like a huge kind of peace.

After playing until I was exhausted on the white sand, I crawled onto the mat.

When I took out the sandwiches, Mandy gave a thumbs up after tasting one.

“Jean, you’re pretty good. You could open a cafe.”

“If I open one, come visit. I’ll give you a thirty percent discount.”

Maria loved the sandwiches I made too.

I told her the recipe, but she wasn’t interested in cooking, so she never made them herself.

So whenever she wanted a sandwich, she’d subtly nudge me.

‘She’s doing well, right?’

Maria, Raphael, Tristan, and Johan.

I miss all of them.

I decided to throw away everything related to Mist Island, but was that just my arrogance?

“You’re making that weird face again.”

Noah pressed between my brows with his finger.

Maybe because he has three older sisters, he’s way too casual.

“I’m not!”

“Jessica made that face when she gained four kilos a week after getting dumped.”

“…You want to fight me, don’t you?”

When I jumped to my feet, Noah raised both hands, asking for mercy, and Mandy clapped, telling me to hit him.

That was when it happened.

“Huh?”

Noah narrowed his eyes and stared past me.

I turned my head to follow his gaze, but there was nothing there except the cliff.

“What is it?”

“I think I saw someone over there just now.”

“On the cliff?”

“Yeah. But they were looking this way.”

“You must’ve seen wrong. And that cliff is a restricted area. There’s even a three-meter fence at the entrance, so how would anyone get in?”

“No. There really was someone. A man….”

Noah frowned, tilting his head for a while before settling on an explanation.

“Maybe it was a seabird or a seagull. It’s a place people don’t go, so they could’ve built a nest there.”

“Probably.”

A man?

The thought lingered, an unnecessary image that wouldn’t leave my mind.

Just as I was about to grow uneasy, Nelson came over with a ball in his mouth.

“Noah. Could you watch Nelson for a few days?”

“My sister’s a vet, so it’s fine, but why?”

“Someone tried to break into my place, so I’m planning to stay at a hotel until the security bars are installed. But all the pet-friendly rooms are booked.”

Mandy’s mouth fell open. “I heard the break-ins have been really bad lately! You’re staying at a hotel? Why don’t you just come stay at our place?”

“No. I already paid for everything.”

“Don’t worry. If Noah can’t, I can take him too.”

Come to think of it, Mandy said she’d raised a dog since she was young, and it passed away from old age a few years ago.

“Then I’ll leave him with you.”

“Of course. Your safety comes first.”

As thanks, I promised to treat Mandy and Noah to an amazing meal soon.

Before we parted, I hugged Nelson tight.

“Nelson. Don’t forget me, okay?”

That idiot, he’s going to be away from me for half a month, but he’s all excited as he leaves with Noah.

Shuffle, shuffle.

I opened the door, and on the hotel sofa….

“…Giselle.”

Johan was sitting there, so furious it wouldn’t be strange if he strangled me on the spot.