Time of the Blind Beast - Chapter 44

Even his voice carried no particular emotion. The composure of a man for whom being born a Valdemaira was such a given that he had never once considered another possibility.

For a moment, all her courage dissolved.

Was it really alright to go on speaking?

Hesitating, Rose opened her mouth once more. “Major, you fought the war from a position far more difficult, dangerous, and burdensome than most. Didn’t you ever feel aggrieved or regretful, thinking that if you’d just been the son of an ordinary family, you might have been spared such hardship?”

“Not at all.”

Again, he responded immediately.

“If I was born a Valdemaira, I should remain a Valdemaira until the day I die. I’m proud that I had the opportunity to make a name for myself because I was born into the Valdemaira family.”

His reaction was so resolute, not even a needle could slip through.

He was a man for whom being born a Valdemaira was a fact so natural, he had no desire to escape it.

“His Excellency’s wish is: You are no longer a Valdemaira. Never set foot in Claris again. Go hide in a place where eyes and ears cannot reach, and live quietly… Those were his words.”

Had he admitted, even for a moment, that he had ever envisioned a life as a common man—or even said that he might be willing to accept such a life—Rose had intended to carefully broach the errand Merlot had brought.

She would have said that, just as she had felt today while out walking, the world was full of small, comforting happinesses if one only looked for them. That it was alright not to live in wealth. That she would be his eyes, ears, and hands, staying by his side forever.

So if… if he was even slightly open to the idea, how would it be if the two of them left this place and lived quietly together, chasing after modest joys while burying the past?

That was the selfish hope she had dared to harbor.

But the life he desired was far too different from Rose’s wish.

His path was far broader and more distant than hers. They might share a fleeting moment, but they could never walk the entire road together.

Rose imagined stars swimming somewhere in the lightless night sky.

It was a night full of secrets, both hers and the stars’.

Merlot’s suspicion, spurred by his veiled references to Akenaus, still lingered in her ears. No matter how she shook her head, she couldn’t cast it off.

Even now, she wasn’t sure she had handled it correctly.

“I just don’t understand. After casting him out so thoroughly, how does the Valdemaira family now claim it’s their business who stays by the Major’s side?”

For a brief instant, Merlot’s suspicion had shaken her.

But Rose quickly seized herself.

She couldn’t afford to falter yet. It was an accusation brought without evidence, based on nothing but suspicion. She had to stay sharp.

Praying that her trembling wouldn’t show on the outside, Rose snapped back at Merlot.

Half of it was courage, the other half sheer defiance.

“Isn’t it the Valdemaira family that has no right to interfere with the Major? You didn’t even reveal who you were or why you came, and you were secretly spying. At least between us, it’s clear who can stand proudly before the Major. Whether you suspect me or not is none of my concern.”

“If my remarks came across as rude, I apologize. I had no intention of offending you.”

Caught off guard by her resistance, Merlot showed a hint of fluster before hastily recovering. The errand man, who had quickly done the mental math, bowed his head and offered a polite apology.

“In truth, I did hear a bit about you as well. That elderly chamberlain in this mansion seems quite fond of you. She said you’re connected to Major Ezekiel by a rather special tie.”

Rose wasn’t surprised. The errand man who had collected rumors about Ezekiel upon descending to Derosa must have discreetly asked around or eavesdropped about her as well.

“No matter how closely I examined it, the story was so flawless that I had to wonder. When you live in a mansion as grand as Valdemaira and encounter all sorts of people, you develop a kind of occupational hazard. A suspicion complex, if you will. You start to think that any story that’s perfectly beautiful must be scripted. Especially in Claris, where lies and scripts run rampant.”

The man explained himself earnestly. Rose simply stood there and watched Merlot.

“We’ll likely need each other’s help often in the future. I don’t want to sour things between us over something like this. It was my mistake. I hope we can get along well.”

It was unclear whether Merlot had backed down because he genuinely let go of his suspicions or because he still needed Rose’s cooperation regarding Ezekiel. Either way, Merlot no longer showed any signs of doubt.

“By the way, something’s been bothering me.”

While Rose had been lost in thought, Ezekiel muttered.

“Yes?”

Had she unknowingly said something wrong?

Rose quickly replayed their conversation in her mind, checking for any slip-ups.

“Rose, how long are you going to keep calling me Major?”

“…Pardon?”

“You know. My name.”

Ezekiel.

Rose repeated it in her mind.

Ezekiel—

How could she say that name aloud? That name tangled up with so many complicated stories and countless emotions. She couldn’t call him Ezekiel without guilt. The very thought made her want to cry.

“Someday… later.”

“Why?”

“I’m a maid. I should maintain the proper decorum that befits a contractual relationship.”

Still, the only excuse she could offer was the difference in their social status.

“Is that really all there is between us? Just a simple contract?”

“…I did enter this estate as a hired maid, and I’m still working and receiving wages. If I’m treated too differently from Madam Serva and the other staff, it makes it awkward to work together.”

At her explanation, Ezekiel sighed. “I really need to finish my treatment soon. There are too many things to correct.”

So many issues had become entangled due to this one unresolved matter of his sight.

Ezekiel furrowed his brows. Rose reached out and gently smoothed the wrinkle between his eyes with her fingers.

“When your vision is restored…”

Nothing was certain yet, but if his blindness were cured, then she must never be seen again.

Her time in this mansion would have to be treated like a dream.

But he seemed to interpret her murmuring differently—he thought she was referring to what he planned to set right once he could see again.

“I will take revenge. On Akenaus and that woman who made me like this. I plan to pay them back with everything I’ve got, just as much as I suffered.”

His sudden declaration of vengeance struck Rose like a bite.

She drew in a sharp breath.

Ah. This was a man who harbored a furious beast in his chest. She had been momentarily distracted by the gentleness he had started to show her.

It felt as if a blade had grazed the entrance of her heart—cold and searing.

“Did I scare you, Rose? Why are you trembling?”

Even that fleeting shiver didn’t escape his sharp senses.

“I’m not going to hurt you. There’s no reason to be afraid. You, more than anyone, understand how I feel. You’ve been watching over me all this time.”

“…Yes. I understand.”

She had seen a man who had lost all trust in humanity. A man who had fallen to the loneliest depths. A man living a life without light. A man robbed of reason and freedom. A man surviving day by day, dependent on opium and alcohol.

It was by her own hands that he had been destroyed. There was no excuse.

Ezekiel’s anger and thirst for revenge were justified. She understood. And someday, he would inevitably come to harm her.

Even so.

Despite all of that.

There was no stopping this heart.