Time of the Blind Beast - Chapter 103

His father couldn’t ease the crease between his brows, as if his temples were throbbing.

“Akenaus, that foolish and thoughtless brat, sided with Davis to save his own skin. So I signed off on officially expelling him from the family for his treason. Additionally, Valdemaira has agreed to take responsibility for this incident by compensating the royal family with three estates and a sum equivalent to ten years’ budget.”

It was quite unexpected. Though Akenaus had been expelled, the consequences for a crime committed by someone of Valdemaira’s blood were surprisingly lenient. But then again, if a house would stagger from that level of reparations, it could never be called Valdemaira in the first place.

“Given that the entire family could have been wiped out, you should be grateful this ends with such a generous punishment. That’s how much Astrie expects from you now. That man will never set foot in Valdemaira again. And not just Valdemaira, he’s now a traitor to Astrie.”

Ezekiel replied in a cold tone, “That couldn’t be helped. It’s what he brought upon himself.”

“This isn’t about what could be helped or not. Now Valdemaira rests on your shoulders. Ezekiel, you are all that remains of this family.”

That was the reason his father couldn’t accept Lisanne.

To restore the family’s honor tarnished by Akenaus, he wanted to tie the sole remaining heir of Valdemaira into a grand marriage alliance to showcase the family’s enduring power.

Ezekiel pressed his lips tightly for a moment, then slowly steadied his breath. “Is this how you spoke to Mother when you married her?”

At the sudden shift in topic, his father narrowed his eyes. “What are you implying?”

“As if sitting at a negotiation table to discuss indemnities, as if bringing in a quality broodmare to breed. I used to think my mother, who enjoys the wealth of Valdemaira yet cares little for its fate, was a heartless woman. But now I see she may not have been entirely at fault.”

His father hadn’t been entirely indifferent to his mother.

In the past, when Akenaus was firmly holding his place in the main house, and Ezekiel, with uncertain prospects due to his blindness, was still seeking a home with Lisanne, he had searched for a place where she could live safely and comfortably—away from the cold and danger of the north, even if not for himself.

Likewise, his father had repaired estates across Astrie and even built a new castle for his wife. That couldn’t have come from a place of indifference. Whether it was concern, affection, fondness, or even compensation, it was based on something.

Their marriage had started as a political arrangement. Love may not have been there from the beginning. But if, over time, his father’s heart had changed while his mother’s never did, there must have been a reason.

He recalled hearing that when his mother rarely returned to the main house, his otherwise taciturn father would sometimes come down to the dining room to match her mealtime. Still, those meals were said to be suffocatingly quiet, with barely a word exchanged between them.

“Was that kind of life truly acceptable to you?”

He hadn’t asked expecting an answer. Ezekiel already knew it himself.

“I can’t live that way.”

Fern Valdemaira, as the head of the house, was a man of exceptional responsibility. Unlike Ezekiel’s indifferent mother, he had fulfilled his parental role in his own way. Yet, he had never been a husband who could hold on to a wife who constantly drifted away. He excelled in maintaining the family and negotiating with the nation, but with his wife, he was so distant it seemed he merely followed her shadow.

Ezekiel imagined what it would be like if his relationship with Lisanne mirrored that of his parents. Having a child to carry on the family line, only to spend the rest of their decades apart, Lisanne visiting the main house like a guest every few years while he guarded the estate alone. A marriage where they didn’t share a bedroom, and even during the occasional meals together, not a word would pass between them.

In the past, he might have considered such a relationship a normal part of marriage. The only example of married life he had grown up seeing was so cold.

If he hadn’t become a blind man who fell in love and lived intimately with a woman he didn’t even know the face of, he might have spent his entire life believing that half of human emotion was all there was to the world.

“If my wife keeps trying to leave me, I would ask her not to leave me alone in this vast mansion. I would fall asleep with her every night in the same bed, eat at the same table, and happily share small stories. If she wanted to travel somewhere, I would go with her.”

“You’re saying you’d abandon Valdemaira to follow a woman? Do you have no pride?”

“Why would I need pride, with my wife?”

If they were life partners, then his life would be hers, and hers would be his. In fact, protecting her pride would be the way to protect his own. He would sooner assert his pride against the nation than feel the need to wield it in front of his wife.

“Only those who marry for business talk about pride in marriage.”

With such a view of marriage, they end up saying ridiculous things like letting a formal wife come from a suitable household while Lisanne stays as a mistress to bear children. If he had ever intended to treat Lisanne that way, he would not have sent his subordinates across the land to search for her.

“In the end, I’ll be the one guarding this country’s borders. So what if I don’t parade around some political marriage? I’m not so incompetent that I need to rely on my wife’s family.”

“Ezekiel, you think you’re the only smart one. Do you believe the rest of the world enters political marriages because they’re all incompetent? They choose that path because it’s easy and secure. It’s already been proven by those who came before!”

Finally, his father’s voice rose. Frustrated by his son’s refusal to listen, he snapped, then took a short breath and continued.

“It’s like a farmer choosing fertile, rich soil over barren, dry land when planting fruit. That way, they can reap more with less effort. So why are you so intent on choosing barren, dry land?”

“Have you ever set foot on barren, dry land, Father?”

Ezekiel responded in a steady tone.

“Given the obligations of Valdemaira, you’ve rarely left Claris. And even when you did travel, I imagine they were to places with splendid views and mild climates. But I’ve led my men through places people don’t usually go, several barren and arid regions. Places where the ground is full of gravel, where rain rarely falls and the soil crumbles like dust. I thought nothing could grow in such places.”

His lips twisted at an angle as he continued, “But surprisingly, what I saw were lush vineyards. Did you know? Vines growing in those regions dig their roots deeper than ordinary ones. They search for water and nutrients hidden deep underground. And trees that survive such harsh conditions grow tenaciously, so tenaciously, they live longer than most.”

Even in the harsh environment where he had lost his sight and fallen into addiction with alcohol and laudanum, Lisanne had sprouted green shoots. For him, there had never been any other choice. As fate dictated, he would cling to her and love her stubbornly, relentlessly, for a long, long time.

“The grapes grown in places that don’t even seem suitable for planting bear fruit that becomes wine so fine, most people won’t taste it even once in their lives. As you surely found out by sending someone to investigate Derosa, I’ve lived as a drunk for a time. And to my taste, barren, dry land is far more appealing.”

Facing his father’s expression of disbelief, Ezekiel spoke every word with slow precision.

“Did you say Valdemaira rests on my shoulders? Very well. As you wish, I’ll carry that name. And I’ll carry Lisanne as well. I’m a greedy man. I won’t give up either. I’ll carry both Valdemaira and Lisanne on these shoulders.”

Their unwavering gazes clashed in the air. Ezekiel met his father’s eyes with composure and concluded the conversation.

“But if I absolutely must set one down, I can’t promise it won’t be Valdemaira.”