The Princess's Private Tutoring - Chapter 15

Episode 15. Test

Whenever Celestia was honest, Killian’s thoughts froze.

He never knew how to respond to her pretty, pure concern for him.

From the start, he was not worthy of Celestia’s worry.

Especially when he recalled what he had done over the last three days, going without food or sleep.

This month’s curse had been unusually long and harsh.

It must have been because he had met Celestia directly. The desire he had ignored and suppressed all this time had erupted even more violently as a rebound.

Even after swallowing suppressants, even after taking sleeping pills, nothing worked.

He endured two full days of torment completely conscious.

It wasn’t really a curse, but lust. Not suffering, but rut.

His semen had grown so thin it was nearly clear, and his cock was sore from constant rubbing. His head pounded from the pungent, heady smell of night-blooming flowers.

All of it, while imagining Celestia.

So now he knelt at Celestia’s feet, guilty for what he had done.

Unable to confess, he only forced a bitter smile and lowered his head, staring only at the gentle curve of Celestia’s instep.

“How could I dare to comment on Your Highness’s actions? I only spoke out of excess concern. Please don’t mind it.”

This was all he could say.

Killian lowered her foot carefully to the ground. Even in the way he released it, regret lingered.

“Then I’ll take it as permission. I’ll worry about you as much as I want. So tell me, what was wrong with you?”

The muscle beneath Killian’s eye twitched faintly.

“Tell me. I’ll send medicine if I have to.”

“It was nothing serious.”

“Do you have a medical license?”

Killian shrugged and sat down on the sofa.

Celestia scooted toward the edge of her seat. She wanted to look closely at him, who had claimed he was unwell.

Killian clicked his tongue inwardly.

‘The table is too small.’

Because of that, the two of them sat far too close.

In a palace overflowing with wealth, how could they place such a tiny table between them, barely large enough for a single tray?

Killian found the table intolerable.

If the person who purchased it had known his thoughts, they would have been offended.

The table may have been small, but its legs were jade, its top fine marble, its edges inlaid with gold—an object of luxury.

A man with Killian’s discerning eye could not have failed to recognize it, yet with Celestia so close, he noticed nothing but her.

“Did the table do something wrong?”

When Killian only glared at it, Celestia asked.

“No. I thought something was on it.”

The table was so polished that even a fly would slip off it, but Killian wiped it with his hand anyway.

“Perhaps because this room was chosen at the last moment, the cleaning wasn’t thorough. I’ll make sure it’s done properly next time.”

“There’s no need,” Killian answered quickly. He didn’t want anyone unfairly scolded because of him.

“So you mean you don’t dislike this place?”

“Of course.”

“Good. From now on, we’ll have lessons here.”

“Here?”

“Do you dislike it because it wasn’t cleaned well? Then I’ll call the servant in charge and speak to them myself.”

Celestia half rose as if to summon someone. She wasn’t serious, but Killian hurriedly reached out.

“Let’s continue lessons here. I like it very much.”

“Continue?”

“Yes. Looking again, it’s cozy and pleasant.”

“Really?” Celestia turned back toward him with her hips half raised.

Killian gave a faint smile and nodded. “Please sit, Your Highness.”

Celestia cheered inwardly. It was a lucky strike.

‘I’ll be able to sit close to him again.’

She sipped her tea, suppressing the smile tugging at her lips.

“Sir Killian, before we start the lesson, there’s something I need to tell you.”

Killian, who had been preparing his lesson materials, looked at her. Her reflection showed clearly in the depths of his dark eyes.

His steady, serious gaze gave Celestia courage.

“You must have heard from Houston. The truth is, I have a serious problem.”

Killian froze.

“I can’t handle physical contact with men. Even if I never marry, I’ll still need to do that to live. But whenever I’m with a man, I feel such revulsion…”

Celestia lowered her head in shame.

“You know it’s not easy for me to say this to you, right?”

Killian shut his eyes tightly.

“Yes. I know.”

He ground out the words between clenched teeth.

‘Is he angry? Was I too forward? We haven’t even begun…’

Celestia lifted only her eyes to glance at him. With his eyes closed, it was impossible to know what he was thinking.

“What do you want of me? This is my first time with such lessons… I don’t know how I should help.”

“You’ll do as I say, won’t you?”

Celestia, who had spoken with joy, quickly clamped her mouth shut.

“I must have gotten too excited at the hope that Sir Killian might solve my problem. You must be flustered. I’m sorry.”

Killian’s lashes trembled faintly.

“Don’t apologize.”

His voice grew lower.

Contrary to her worry, Killian only worried for Celestia.

He pitied her, forced to bare her shame just to confide her struggle.

The fact that she was desperate enough to consider sex without marriage just to survive cut his chest to ribbons.

And he despised himself for not being able to help her right away.

Most of all, he was devastated that he could not be the man to break her curse.

Celestia, meanwhile, felt nothing but gladness.

‘Is Sir Killian willing to help me?’

She had expected refusal, but instead he was cooperative.

‘I can’t miss this chance.’

Celestia dabbed at her eyes as though wiping away tears and said, “I won’t burden you. We should at least start with a test, shouldn’t we?”

“A test…?”

“You said it at the first lesson. We’d test things before deciding on the lesson plan.”

“I said that… did I?”

Killian’s memory was sharp. Sharp enough that sometimes he wished it weren’t.

“So let’s test. I don’t know how much I can handle with a man, or how much I can endure.”

Celestia’s eyes sparkled.

Killian was troubled.

What she meant by test was holding hands and hugging.

“Your Highness, you didn’t mind when I escorted you. Can’t we skip holding hands, then?”

“Putting my hand on someone’s arm and holding hands are different. Escorting is like this.”

Celestia reached out and lightly touched his forearm. He stiffened.

“Holding hands is like this.”

Celestia clasped her own hands together, fingers interlocked. Killian’s eyes widened.

“You hold hands like that?”

“Didn’t you ever do that when courting?”

Killian nearly answered no, but shut his mouth. He had never courted anyone at all.

Celestia let out a sigh—whether of relief or disappointment, even she didn’t know.

“Help me, Sir Killian.”

Celestia clasped her hands together so tightly her knuckles whitened.

Her desperation pricked his heart.

“Just give the order. I am your knight.”

Celestia smiled. It was a faintly bitter smile.

If she ordered it, he would obey.

Of course Celestia knew that. But she didn’t want to take him by command.

‘That’s the very last resort.’

Only if he utterly rejected her.

‘No, even then, I won’t command him.’

There would be no meaning in forcing him that way.

Even if things began as duty or responsibility, she wanted him to desire her truly.

‘Lyla and Anne dismissed it as naïve nonsense. But I can’t help it.’

She had seen it countless times, working beside her father. One-sided relationships always collapsed in the end.

‘Politics, diplomacy, industry, trade—whatever the field, anything unbalanced will fall.’

Celestia wanted her bond with Killian to be long and steady.

So even if things began tilted, by the time they reached the goal, the scales had to be balanced.

Even if it were a political marriage.

‘No. That would be the last, last, very last resort.’

Like her mother and father, Celestia wanted marriage built on mutual care.

And she was doing her utmost for that.

“Let’s start by holding hands.”

Celestia pushed her chair beside the table and held out her hand.

Her fingertips trembled nervously, afraid he might refuse.