Swan Grave - Chapter 27

***

That day was the first time Rothbart had revealed his innermost thoughts to Anna to such an extent. Until then, everything about his wife had remained vague.

As fragments of truth drew closer, a small spark of jealousy ignited in a corner of Anna’s heart. For someone who had no one to rely on in the whole world, who sold her body simply to return and tend to her parents’ ashes, how could she not envy the Marchioness, who had someone yearning for her alone?

If only Rothbart loved me as much as he loved the Marchioness…

Anna shook her head at the absurd thought. After all that Rothbart had done to her, instead of hating him, here she was longing for even a shred of his affection. It was nothing short of Stockholm syndrome.

Perhaps it was because nothing in this world held much weight for her. Perhaps because, ever since her parents’ passing, her life had drifted like duckweed, untethered to anyone. Or perhaps it was because her rising threshold for corruption and her body’s increasing ease in arousal made her willingly accept the pleasure he gave her.

Come to think of it, from the start, he had seen through her weaknesses as if reading the palm of his hand. And yet, she had offered up her body to him under the pretext of bearing a child. Her body, completely conquered, now shook her very mind.

But Anna knew the truth. A man like Rothbart would never give his heart to any woman but the Marchioness. Not because he loved her, but because he hated her. To fully love another woman, he would first have to let go of his hatred for the Marchioness, and he was the kind of man who would cling to that resentment for life.

That was why, even if he ever loved someone again, it would never be Anna. Because she was a swan, resembling the Marchioness. Because he would never be able to erase the shadow of the Marchioness that always hovered over her, he would choose not to love at all.

‘What use is it making excuse after excuse about why that man can’t love me?’

Anna scoffed.

From the start, she wasn’t someone worthy of love. She knew it herself. She was neither particularly sociable nor proactive. She had no distinct hobbies, nor any clever wit. She was simply someone who existed, present yet unnoticed.

If anyone ever claimed to like her, it was certain they had no interest in her inner self. Sehyun was like that too. He had been kind to her, but he had never truly cared. What he liked was her face, which was passably pleasant to look at.

So unless it was this face and body resembling the Marchioness, Anna had no charm that could draw the Marquess’s interest.

Anna soon grew curious about the Marchioness. Sharing a similar face and even a similar name, unlike Anna, she must have been lovable and captivating. Someone anyone would fall for without escape… That must have been why even that arrogant demon was ensnared beyond resistance.

Thinking that way, Anna could even understand the Marchioness’s decision to leave Rothbart.

If she was such a lovable person, she must have been showered with love in her original world, and she must have given it in return. If just the thought of her parents’ ashes made Anna’s chest tighten, how many more dear ones must the Marchioness have left behind when she fell into this world?

She couldn’t have helped it. Surely she, too, had suffered.

Soon Anna recalled the Marchioness’s diary she had never opened. Had Rothbart ever read it? Since Svanhild had said the language was incomprehensible, perhaps he had left it as an unsolved mystery.

Wouldn’t he be curious about what was written inside?

Now that Anna knew the way back to the original world, there was no need to read it. Still, she felt a needless curiosity.

‘But there’s no reason to take such a foolish risk…’

Anna sighed. Curiosity killed the cat, after all. Since anything concerning the Marchioness was Rothbart’s reverse scale, nothing good could come from touching it carelessly.

For now, he was interested in her, but only to a point. If she provoked his wrath, she couldn’t be sure what treatment would await her.

***

That evening, Madame Dova handed Anna ointment and bandages. To Anna, who looked puzzled, she sighed and added that she should apply them to her palms.

“For the time being, don’t let your hands get wet. Understood?”

“Yes.”

Anna nodded blankly as she looked at the ointment. It was clear that Rothbart had deliberately ordered it. They were merely light scrapes that could have come from any simple fall. It wasn’t something worth Rothbart’s concern.

Feeling a needless flutter in her chest, Anna fidgeted with the side of the tin case holding the ointment.

Perhaps he found it bothersome for her hands to be injured when they were meant to grasp his cock. Or perhaps he simply disliked the idea of scars being left. Anna struggled to stifle her restless emotions.

Either way, she decided she should at least thank him. With that thought, she drifted off to sleep, but the next morning, she was met by Rothbart, hastily preparing to go out.

“Something urgent has come up in the territory. I must leave at once.”

Rothbart clicked his tongue in displeasure.

Dressed in a vicuña coat, with a gold-trimmed cane and a silk hat, he was the very model of a perfect gentleman. His shoes always gleamed at the tips, and not a wrinkle marred his clothes.

Anna stood awkwardly at his door, watching as he prepared in haste. She was, after all, a maid, and it felt wrong to simply stand by and do nothing, so she stepped forward to help. But Rothbart stopped her.

“Don’t busy yourself with pointless things. Stay in the room and rest quietly. I will return in the afternoon.”

It’s been a while since you’ve had freedom. Rothbart added with a mocking sneer.

Anna, who had been worrying he might tell her to come along, finally let out a sigh of relief. Knowing his nature, if he had felt aroused, he would have pushed her down regardless of being outside. She could easily imagine what might happen if she accompanied him.

Even if he could brainwash people, the thought of doing such things outside still repulsed her.

And so Rothbart left, leaving Anna alone. Suddenly faced with free time, she stood there, grappling with the unfamiliar sense of what to do.

Since arriving in this world, Anna had never truly rested. She had always been busy adapting to her work, and on days off, she sought ways to return to her original world. This sudden freedom felt uncomfortable, like wearing clothes that didn’t fit.

She wandered toward the kitchen and asked Susan, “Susan, is there anything I can help with?”

“What is it, Anna? Where is the master?”

“The master went out.”

“Ah, I see. That explains it.”

Only then did Susan nod as if it made sense. Ever since Anna had become the Marquess’s personal maid, she had always been seen following him like a shadow.

Anna added awkwardly with a smile, “I suddenly have free time, but nothing to do. Tell me if I can help.”

“Oh no, that won’t do. Ever since you became the master’s maid, you haven’t really had any days off. Don’t overwork yourself. If you have nothing to do, take a good nap.”

The head chef, standing behind Susan, stretched his neck toward Anna and joined in.

“If we make you work and Madame Dova finds out, she’ll scold us. Do as Susan says and go rest.”

Since the kitchen’s head authority had spoken, Anna couldn’t linger. She had no choice but to leave the kitchen.

The other maids said the same as Susan. Betty even laughed, adding that if the Marquess found out his personal maid had been put to work, he wouldn’t be pleased. It was certainly possible.

Looks like the only choice is to rest in my room. Moving slowly toward the attic where the maids’ quarters were, Anna happened to run into Svanhild and Rose, who had just finished their lessons.