In This Life, I Will Be Your Dog - Chapter 71

The sound of the chair scraping across the floor felt like a warning bell, as if urging her to prepare herself.

Though she found it absurd that a man would react to just a few words, Bellona, who had yet to decide how to deal with Impes, watched him approach with an expressionless face.

The man stepped closer and abruptly perched on the edge of the table, looking down at her intently.

“You must find it amusing, toying with me like this.”

“Please mind your manners.”

“Ah, manners. Of course. After all, you are now a proper Grand Duchess.”

Sneering, Impes picked up her neatly placed knife and ran it across the tablecloth, as if sketching a picture.

“So I’m asking you—do you enjoy playing with me?”

Pressing the knife’s tip into the table, he leaned forward to meet her gaze.

As expected, the man revealed his true colors quicker than anticipated, and his insolent behavior pushed her thoughts closer to a decision.

“Grand Duchess, have you already forgotten the night we spent together?”

“How could I?”

Her vibrant green eyes, as if signaling the end of her deliberation, sparkled with allure.

The man who had been acting frivolously a moment ago suddenly turned sharp, his gaze fierce.

“If you remember, then answer me one thing.”

“Go ahead.”

The man, frowning as though hesitant, fiddled with a stray strand of her slightly disheveled red hair before smoothing it out. His question came softly:

“That night we spent together—did you really go looking for Caelus at dawn?”

Impes, who had been harboring resentment ever since Caelus had provoked him with lies, was determined to hear the truth directly from her.

What should I say? Bellona pondered briefly before taking a leisurely sip of water, as if toying with his emotions further. Her long eyelashes fluttered down and then slowly lifted, her movements exuding an air of nonchalance.

His nervous gaze, desperate for her denial, clung tenaciously to her composed expression, almost devouring every detail.

“If I were to be honest with you, would you believe me?”

“If it’s something worth believing.”

“Even if you won’t believe me, I’ll tell you. I’ve wanted to say this for a while.”

His Adam’s apple bobbed as if he were nervous.

Despite his earlier bravado, the sight of him now, waiting anxiously for her answer, seemed pitiful.

Even so, Bellona lowered her gaze with a somber expression, as if recalling a distressing memory.

“That night, after attending to Your Highness, I left the palace early. While on my way back to my quarters, I happened to run into the Grand Duke, who was out for a walk.”

Impes’s crimson eyes flickered menacingly.

“Seeing how unsteady I was, he supported me. Apparently, I looked so unwell that he even advised me to consult the court physician.”

“So you went along with it?”

The man’s speech grew informal, and his face twisted into a grimace.

“I wasn’t in my right mind at the time. Sir Ether had poisoned me that day.”

When she lifted her head to meet his gaze, he awkwardly cleared his throat and looked away.

Pretending not to notice, Bellona continued speaking, even going so far as to adopt a deliberately awkward tone to deceive him completely.

“As you saw that day, I could barely manage my own body. By the time I realized what I had done, it was already dawn, and I was attending to Your Highness.”

As if embarrassed, she averted her eyes, and this time, his gaze followed hers relentlessly.

“At first, I was confused. I feared what would happen if anyone discovered someone like me had attended to Your Highness. So I fled, only to encounter the Grand Duke.”

Ignoring the increasingly ferocious expression on his face, Bellona skillfully wove a tale that mixed truth and lies, exaggerating her account of that day.

“I had no choice but to accompany him to his palace at his command. But nothing happened that day. You could say I preserved my dignity at the cost of my loyalty.”

“That doesn’t mean you had to become one of his subordinates—”

“I have a principle never to mix personal and professional matters. That’s why I served him as my superior. My heart, however—”

Pausing briefly, she looked Impes directly in the eye.

“—was with someone else.”

“……!”

“Although it was a sentiment unworthy of a mere knight.”

As she smiled bitterly, Impes suddenly stood, grabbing her chin and forcing her to meet his arrogant gaze.

“Who was it?”

“What’s the point of saying now? I’m already the Grand Duke’s woman.”

“Then why? That morning, you told me you’d become the Grand Duchess. I offered you my hand, but you rejected it!”

His sudden outburst, filled with rage, caused veins to pop in his reddening eyes. His grip on her chin tightened, betraying his wounded pride.

Bellona, her expression unchanged, stared straight at him as she continued, her tone accusatory.

“Have you forgotten how you treated me that day? You humiliated me in front of the knights, mocking me and saying you’d take me as your mistress if I so wished. Do you not recall those condescending words?”

“That’s—”

“You trampled on my sincerity, my feelings. That’s when I realized—you only see me as a toy to play with and discard, Your Highness.”

Pouring out her resentment like a woman wronged, the man who had been panting with indignation threw his head back, exhaling roughly.

Bellona keenly observed his state and continued to stoke the fire in his chest with relentless precision.

“I knew well that I was dreaming in vain. That’s why I tried to give up. I didn’t want to be discarded miserably by Your Highness.”

“So, are you saying you chose Caelus because of me?”

“No. There’s another reason I had no choice but to choose the Grand Duke.”

The man, suppressing his anger with effort, took a deep breath and gestured with a nod for her to continue.

“After parting with you in the training grounds that day, Her Majesty the Empress came to see me.”

At the mention of that day, Impes’s brow furrowed deeply, as if recalling the events vividly. Surely, he would remember how she had run to report the matter herself.

Swallowing her scorn, Bellona recounted her conversation with the Empress, deftly mixing truth and lies to confuse him further.

“Meeting Her Majesty unsettled me. On a whim, I confessed my feelings. I told her that I wanted to be Your Highness’s woman. That if Her Majesty permitted, I would devote everything to you right away.”

“…Is that true?”

“Yes. But, of course, Her Majesty flew into a rage. And that wasn’t all—she looked ready to kill me on the spot if I didn’t relent. It was then I realized again that unless I were born of noble blood, I could never stay by Your Highness’s side.”

His fists clenched so tightly that the veins on his hands bulged, and he bit the inside of his cheek.

Bellona couldn’t tell who he was angry at, but she hoped the target of his fury was the Empress.

“So, because of my mother, you turned to Caelus?”

“The Grand Duke eventually showed me his true heart. He said he wanted to protect me. I had no choice. There was no one else in this palace who would protect someone like me—a mere knight. At that time, I only wanted to leave the palace. Her Majesty the Empress terrified me.”

“You should have told me!”

“What would have changed if I had?”

“It would’ve changed everything! At least we wouldn’t be meeting like this now. I would have protected you.”

“It would’ve been different! At least you wouldn’t have ended up like this. I would’ve protected you.”

Suddenly, echoes of words he’d spoken in the past reverberated in her mind. He had spoken with such an earnest expression, even as he used her siblings as shields and lied to her until the very end.

The memory of that day, with all its false sincerity, remained as vivid as if it had happened yesterday.

A quiet laugh escaped Bellona’s lips.

Rising slowly from her seat, she spoke in a gentle tone, as if to reveal the truth of his feelings that even he didn’t know.

“You wouldn’t have been able to protect me. I’d have been lucky if you hadn’t discarded me after indulging yourself until you were tired. You can never go against Her Majesty the Empress, can you?”

“What…?”

“Am I wrong?”

Reducing him to a despicable child still clinging to his mother’s skirts, Bellona watched his face twist in a murderous grimace.

Suppressing the anger that threatened to drag her into past memories, she held onto her composure. To shake him to the very end, she remained resolute, exuding the elegance of a Grand Duchess.

“Do you still desire me?”

Seeing the wavering look in the man’s eyes, Bellona, as if to say she felt the same, wore a pitiable expression that further fueled his twisted desire.

“If so, then show me now. Show me that I can be safe in your arms.”

Having served Impes closely, Bellona knew well how to provoke his obsessive tendencies and innate arrogance.

He let out a sudden laugh and tilted his head to the side.

“Then what will you do for me?”

At that moment, Bellona stepped forward, as if she had been waiting for this very question.