In This Life, I Will Be Your Dog - Chapter 116

Thick veins bulged in the clenched fists of the kneeling man. Though this bedroom was more familiar than his own, tonight he couldn’t bear to stay a moment longer—the air itself disgusted him.

Graeme, summoned to the Empress’s palace instead of prison by her command, felt even more humiliated by this situation. The shame was so overwhelming it made his skin crawl.

He had loved and served her like a dog for so long… and now, he was sick of it all.

What did love or intimacy even mean? In moments like this, she never failed to become his sovereign, looking down on him with contempt.

He could no longer even believe Violentia had ever truly loved him.

Perhaps she’d just kept him around like a mutt, used him when needed, used his body for her lust, then discarded him.

She hadn’t even let him speak. In front of all those knights, she’d slapped him and screamed curses.

And the woman who’d treated him like a criminal for mocking her hadn’t offered a single defense.

What could he possibly expect from someone who turned a blind eye to the way Impes treated him?

It wasn’t just the knights—he had suffered that humiliation in front of the Grand Duke and Duchess as well.

But above all, he felt shame for what happened before Olivia.

Graeme no longer had even a shred of trust left in her. Only resentment remained.

As he ground his teeth, Violentia calmly sipped her tea with a composed face, as if none of it had happened, as if she’d already forgotten everything.

“Have you found the soothsayer?”

“……!”

“I suppose not. That’s fine. From now on, we’ll push forward with Impes’s marriage to rally the nobles—”

“Ha! Even now, that’s all you can think about?”

At Graeme’s voice, thick with contempt, her crimson eyes turned icy in an instant.

After letting out a deep sigh and calming herself, she continued evenly, “Once the Crown Prince takes a consort and produces an heir, everything will settle. So continue meeting with the nobles as you’ve done. I’ll handle the Grand Duchess.”

“Your Majesty the Empress!”

“Start with Count Louvre. We can’t afford another change of heart—”

“Violentia! Do you think I’m a joke to you? Am I nothing more than a damn mutt in your eyes?!”

His crazed shouting and use of informal speech made her crimson eyes flare wide.

Violentia clenched her trembling fists, then slowly lifted her chin, regaining her composure.

Her proud gaze bore down on the man kneeling before her—devoid of all emotion.

As though she had already cast him out of her heart.

Graeme let out a bitter laugh and shut his eyes tightly, then opened them again to glare at the woman he had once loved enough to stake his life.

Finally, a hollow voice spilled from his lips.

“It’s over.”

“……”

“Why did I risk everything for something that ended so easily? Why did I cling to you for all those years? I even let our child treat me like filth.”

“Watch your mouth. Are you completely mad?”

At her frigid rebuke, he tilted his head mockingly and gave a dry laugh.

“Why, afraid someone might hear? Well, if people found out someone like me fathered your child, Impes would probably try to kill you.”

“Graeme!”

“You and I are both mad—how could a child of ours possibly turn out normal?!”

At that, she snatched up the teacup on the table, her hand trembling as if she might hurl it at his face.

“My Empress seems much more patient these days. In the past, you’d have thrown this at me already.”

“Shut your mouth. Say one more word and—”

“To think you could be this composed after catching me with another woman—perhaps your heart’s grown softer.”

As he mockingly brought up the incident, Violentia let out a mirthless laugh.

Her crimson eyes, now brimming with scorn, bore into him.

“And so what? Why would I be angry over some lowly man rolling around with some lowborn whore? As you said, you were nothing more than a dog to me—why should I care?”

“……!”

“Don’t delude yourself, Graeme. You were just a dog guarding our house. I only kept you close because you were a bit more useful than the others.”

“Was that… truly how you felt?”

Graeme’s expression twisted into a savage grimace, but Violentia only smiled more brightly, as if entirely unbothered.

“Remember? You once told me a hunting dog that learns to think no longer obeys its master. When that happens, you said, you cut its throat and boil it for stew.”

“So what, you’re planning to cut my throat and stew me?”

She slowly stood, walked up to him, and lowered herself to meet his eyes.

“Graeme.”

She called him gently now, and his eyes trembled at the unexpected tenderness.

Her hand stroked his cheek. Leaning in so close he could feel her breath, she whispered, “There’s only one way to be forgiven. Clear the stain you left on me with your own life. Then I’ll ensure your death is remembered with honor.”

“……!”

“As you’ve always done—for me, for Impes—take the burden alone. Don’t make me be the one who takes the head of the man I once loved.”

A bitter laugh escaped his clenched teeth.

The word ‘love’—which she had never once said in all their years—was now granted to him as she ordered his death.

He gently took the hand stroking his cheek and placed a kiss on her soft palm.

With a voice laced in self-mockery, he let his true feelings slip.

“Wretched woman. You’re a truly wretched woman.”

“I know.”

Suddenly, he grabbed her wrist and crushed her crimson lips with his own.

Despite the rough, punishing kiss, Violentia accepted him willingly.

Their lips clung together as if exchanging grief and blame, and even when they parted, their eyes stayed locked.

Like they were trying to memorize each other’s final expression.

The kiss of farewell lasted longer than it should have.

While her dry crimson eyes remained still, Graeme’s gaze had grown damp.

Even as he was dragged to the imperial prison, he laughed at his own heart—unable to let go of the woman who had abandoned him.

There was no point blaming her.

The true fool was himself, for loving a woman like her to the very end.

***

Bellona silently gazed at the man behind bars.

Once the Empress’s lover, once a marquis elevated by her hand, once a man who had lived a life of splendor—Graeme now looked haggard and defeated.

Seeing his end brought to mind her own past.

No matter how high he had climbed, he was still the Empress’s dog—just like she once was.

Even if they shared bodies, even if they exchanged love, once you were no longer useful, you were discarded.

Oddly, that thought brought comfort.

It wasn’t because she had been ignorant or made a mistake—it was simply the result of one woman’s fickleness.

Perhaps her fall hadn’t been entirely her fault. Perhaps it was inevitable, crushed beneath a power she could never match.

“Thank you for coming to such a wretched place.”

“Why did you call for me?”

At her indifferent voice, Graeme gave a bitter smile and scratched his head.

“I have a request… for the Grand Duchess.”

“What could a marquis possibly want from me?”

When she answered coolly, he let out a small sigh and met her gaze with cold eyes.

“Olivia. Send her far away.”

Bellona’s brow twitched slightly at the unexpected words.

“I know everything. That you’re the one who put her in front of me.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I won’t question you about it. I won’t resent you, either. But just do this one thing. The Empress won’t leave her alone.”

Seeing the conviction in his eyes, Bellona dropped the pretense.

“You speak as though you truly care for her.”

“I don’t know if I’d call it love, but I did care for her deeply.”

“Even though you knew she was deceiving you?”

“Yes. I realized eventually that it was a trap you set—but by then, it didn’t matter. She gave me comfort,” he said with sincerity.

Though she didn’t understand how a man could think like that, Bellona asked with a blank expression, “Because she looked like the Empress?”

He gave a hollow laugh and, as if reminiscing, wore a faint smile.