If You're Going to Sell Yourself, Sell It to Me - Chapter 37

“Ah, well…”

As she tried to look away and move off his lap, Lockwood held her waist, pulling her back onto his lap. Surprised, Georgiana looked up at him, and he scanned her face with concern.

“Does this happen often?”

“Being held on someone’s lap? No, it’s the first time.”

It would also be the last time, she thought, though she didn’t say it aloud.

“No, I meant, being afraid of typhoons. Does that happen often?”

Her face flushed as he clarified his question with a wry smile.

“Oh, I’m sorry! I misunderstood… It’s never happened before. I’ve never felt this way at home. Maybe I’m more afraid of the ship than I thought.”

“It’s your first time on a ship, so that’s understandable.”

“Locke, if it wasn’t my first time on a ship, could it still be possible? I feel like I was on a ship as a child, and there was a typhoon back then too.”

“If something from your past became a trauma, it could trigger a reaction like this. I’ve seen people struggle with specific aftereffects. They don’t always appear until a similar situation arises.”

If I really do have such a trauma, it only strengthens my belief that my dream was a real memory.

“By any chance… do childhood dreams ever involve parents turning into different people?”

Georgiana asked tentatively, feeling as though Lockwood might know the answer to all her questions. She couldn’t figure it out on her own.

“Well, childhood memories can be romanticized, or they can become exaggerated and terrifying. But for parents to completely change into different people? That’s rare. Children’s memories tend to be closely tied to their parents.”

“I see…”

Lockwood’s eyes gleamed for a brief moment as he watched her nod. “Did a different memory come to mind? Parents who aren’t your current ones?”

“No, it’s just a dream, just a dream,” she quickly replied, not wanting to confuse him or seem delusional.

Georgiana decided to keep quiet. When more memories surfaced, things would become clearer.

That said, it was time to get down from his lap. Both of them were fully awake now, and she couldn’t stay on his lap forever.

“Thank you, Locke. Again, you’ve helped me—”

Before she could finish, thunder struck the nearby sea, illuminating the waves and triggering memories from her nightmare. She vividly remembered the screams of people aboard the ship, and the fear she’d felt while trapped in that dark, enclosed space, unsure of when she would be let out.

“Ah!”

She let out a frightened cry and clung to him.

“It’s alright, Anna. You’re safe here,” he whispered soothingly, patting her back gently. Georgiana, trembling in his arms, hugged him tightly as if she might fall if she let go.

As she cried, she spoke incoherently, sharing more than she intended. “Everyone… everyone fell into the water.”

“In your childhood?”

“Yes.”

“Did you fall in too?”

His tone turned serious as he wiped the tears from her cheeks with his fingertips.

“No, the nanny put me inside a bag so I wouldn’t get wet.”

“So you were safe?”

His eyes encouraged her to keep talking.

“Yes, but it grew colder and quieter inside the bag. Then, I lost consciousness.”

“Is that when your dream involved your parents being different people?”

“Yes, but I’m not sure if it’s real.”

“I’ll look into it for you. I’ll find out what memory you’ve forgotten and let you know.”

His low, calming voice put her at ease. If he said he would do it, she believed him. Though he seemed cold and mysterious, he wasn’t the type to break a promise.

Holding her, he gently rocked her as if she were lying in a cradle. Moving in rhythm with the rocking of the ship, her heartbeat gradually slowed, and her sobs quieted.

As she exhaled deeply, trying to calm down, Lockwood cupped her cheek with his large hand.

“It’s amazing to think that all these memories are packed inside such a small head. If you can’t remember them, don’t be sad—it’s probably just because your head is too small.”

His serious tone as he offered this “advice” made her giggle despite herself.

“Surely… that wasn’t meant to comfort me?”

“Of course it was.”

Thunder rumbled again, but this time, with Lockwood so close, she wasn’t as frightened. Instead, she became more aware of something pressing between her legs.

“If you want to comfort someone, you should do it properly.”

Glancing at the darkening sky, Lockwood pulled her even closer, their upper bodies now completely aligned.

“I’ve heard that the best way to erase a bad memory is to replace it with a good one,” he said, gazing down at Georgiana’s lips with a serious look in his eyes.

His deep, intent gaze sent a shiver of fear through her, but also a strange excitement. It felt as if her heart was racing, her mouth suddenly dry, as if she was anticipating something to happen.

Though they were already as close as they could be, with her pressed against him, the distance between them diminished even more as he lowered his head. Their breath mingled as he whispered softly.

“I don’t know what kind of nightmare you had or what bad memory is haunting you, but from now on, when a storm comes, I’ll make sure you think of this first instead of being afraid.”

“W-what thought…!”

Before she could finish her question, his lips swallowed hers whole. As his hand pressed firmly against her chin, her mouth parted, and he naturally slipped inside. Her eyes widened in surprise, and through the window behind him, she could see flashes of lightning.

Boom, crash.

Thunder rumbled wildly from the approaching clouds, but there wasn’t even time to fear the storm. The force with which he was invading her mouth was far more intense and violent than the raging wind and rain outside.

Georgiana couldn’t think anymore.

Her head tilted involuntarily as the force of his advance made her weak. The thick tongue that had slipped between her lips found her small tongue and ensnared it, sticky and tight. The second kiss was far deeper and more intense than the first.

“Mmmph…”

He pulled her tongue as if to draw it out from the very root, making a wet sound as he swallowed it deeply. Along with a sharp twinge of pain, a burning heat spread throughout her body. The sensation shot down to her very toes.

She felt a warmth rising unexpectedly from below. Her hands, which had been wrapped around his waist, tightened their grip. Georgiana straightened her back, fearing that if she didn’t, her body would collapse into a quivering mess at any moment.

“Mm… uh…”

Each time he sucked on her tongue, she felt a strange tightness in her belly, and a soft moan escaped her lips. The sticky, thick kiss made a slick sound from their mouths, now wet from the exchange.

His tongue flickered in and out, reaching the front of her throat.

Feeling like she was being endlessly drawn into him, Georgiana bit down on his tongue as he ran it along the roof of her mouth, an act of frustration. She had no idea that this would be a mistake.

Lockwood, whose tongue had been bitten by her, froze for a moment.

Though she hadn’t bitten hard enough to hurt, his reaction made her cautious, and she opened her eyes, only to be met with his gaze. She trembled like a frightened animal at the sight of his eyes.

In his eyes was a heat she had never seen before. It was like the gaze of a hunter or predator, much like the pictures she had seen in storybooks, and it terrified her.

As she shivered in fear at this unfamiliar feeling, he lowered his hand, gliding it softly down her neck, her fragile back, and to her delicate waist, which fit into his hand as though it were no more than a handful.

His movements resembled those of a beast contemplating how to peel and devour its prey.

As she trembled and tried to turn her head away,  he moved faster. With Georgiana still in his arms, he spun her around and laid her down in the center of the bed.

Georgiana looked up at Lockwood, completely forgetting to breathe.