If You're Going to Sell Yourself, Sell It to Me - Chapter 23

“……!”

The saying that one can be too shocked to scream turned out to be true.

Wide-eyed and scrambling to find something to cover herself with, Georgiana despaired when she saw that both the towel and her clothes were near Lockwood. She couldn’t possibly ask him to hand them to her, and judging by his dazed expression, he was equally stunned.

Why had he managed to hide behind the curtain so quickly, only to stand there now like a statue?

Realizing he wasn’t going to move, she frantically splashed water around, submerging herself in the tub. Bubbles rose and popped in the water as she waited, her breath catching in her throat.

Please, she prayed, please let him have the decency to leave.

After what felt like an eternity, she finally risked raising her head above the water. Thankfully, the spot where he had been standing was now empty. She noticed that he had left his slippers behind, a clear sign of his haste.

How panicked must he have been to forget his slippers?

The thought brought her a small sense of relief, though she still felt a wave of dread at the idea of facing him again after such an embarrassing incident.

What should I do?

She had finished washing, but the thought of leaving the bathroom filled her with anxiety. She couldn’t stay in the bathroom all night, yet if he intended to bathe as well, she should give him space.

Her thoughts were in disarray, her mind a whirl of confusion.

‘Ah, Henry said he would come back later, didn’t he?’

Finally, she dried herself off with the towel and hurriedly dressed in the clothes she had brought with her: a dark blue skirt and an ivory blouse with a matching ribbon at the collar. Though not as elaborate as her outdoor wear, the high-collared blouse and generously cut skirt gave her a sense of modesty and comfort.

Looking around for something to cover her face with, she spotted her wig nearby. She hesitated, thinking it would look ridiculous to wear it at this hour. Instead, she let her hair fall loosely around her face, trying to shield herself as much as possible, and kept her eyes downcast as she exited the bathroom.

She rehearsed a greeting in her mind, but none of the options seemed right.

Should she say, “It’s been a while”? Or maybe, “Thank you”? Or perhaps, “Please pretend you didn’t see anything just now. Just think of it as a nightmare.”

Why was I only thinking of such awkward phrases?

She hoped they could simply exchange a silent nod and leave it at that, but when she stepped into the living room, she saw him pacing on the carpet, looking just as flustered as she felt. Their eyes met, and both spoke at the same time.

“Ah, hello.”

“I apologize for what happened earlier.”

Realizing they had each said something different, they tried again.

“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.”

“It’s been a while.”

“……”

“……”

The awkward silence stretched between them, and Georgiana found herself swallowing the saliva that had gathered in her mouth, afraid even that small sound might echo in the stillness.

However, she felt compelled to thank him for taking care of her, so she took a deep breath and spoke again.

“I heard from Henry that you took care of me. Thank you so much.”

She bowed her head, but found it difficult to raise it again, still too embarrassed to look at him.

“It was nothing.”

“How can you say that? If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have received proper treatment. I’m not sure how I can repay you…”

“You don’t need to do anything. Anyone else would have done the same. Please, don’t give it another thought.”

His response was firm, as if he didn’t want to be thanked. His voice was even and steady, making his words feel colder than they might have otherwise.

Was he worried she might misunderstand his intentions and think he had done something special for her? His tone made it clear that he wanted no such implications.

Though she had no desire to become close to him, his distant attitude still stung a little.

But hearing him speak so plainly helped ease her embarrassment. For a man like him, who painted nude portraits, there was probably nothing awkward about seeing a woman’s body, especially one he wasn’t interested in.

She became convinced that his earlier shock had simply been a reaction to an unexpected situation.

“I understand,” she replied, her voice quieter than before. “By the way, you should use the bed from now on, Mr. Limberton. I’m perfectly fine with the sofa.”

Georgiana forced a smile and pointed to the sofa, but Lockwood glanced at it with a look of displeasure before shaking his head.

“There’s a folding bed available, so you should continue using the bedroom. And it’s not Limberton, it’s Lockwood. Please call me Locke from now on, whether we’re alone or in front of others. It will help avoid mistakes and make us seem more like a real couple. I’ll call you Anna in return.”

She realized he was right. If she continued calling him Mr. Limberton and slipped up in public, it would draw unnecessary attention.

“Lo… Locke. Then I’ll use the folding bed. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable because of me.”

“I’m not uncomfortable at all. But if you insist on taking the folding bed, you’ll make me look like a scoundrel who neglects a sick woman. Just use the bedroom.”

With that, he left the room without waiting for a response, leaving her standing there, still unsure of what to make of him.

***

The sea after sunrise was completely different from the early morning hours.

As Georgiana sat on the balcony, she gazed out at the ocean, unable to see where it ended. The distance made the return journey seem even further away, making her feel as though she would never head back to the empire.

As she let go of all her lingering attachments, she felt a sense of relief, as if she had released everything into the sea. The broken rib had played a part in that.

Willow and Marianne now seemed like distant memories, as though they had nothing to do with her anymore. She no longer felt any pain or suffering because of them.

She didn’t know what awaited her in the New World, but for now, she decided to enjoy the leisure time she had. Who knew when she would have another chance to live without worrying about household chores or living expenses?

Knock, knock.

The door to the balcony opened slightly, and Henry carefully stepped out.

“Is there something you need?” she asked.

“Aren’t you hungry? It’s almost time for lunch.”

“It’s that late already?”

His words made her realize that it was nearly noon. No wonder her head had been feeling warm despite the canopy above the balcony.

Still, she didn’t feel particularly hungry.

She had eaten so much porridge and scrambled eggs for breakfast that her stomach was still full. But she hesitated to skip lunch, not knowing what the evening would bring. As she debated, Henry gently encouraged her to eat.

“Even if you’re not very hungry, it’s important to eat. That way, you can take your medicine and recover quickly. You only ate a little bird’s portion for breakfast, so I was worried.”

She had thought she ate a lot, but to Henry, it must have seemed too little.

But a bird’s portion…

Her heart swelled with emotion, realizing that Henry, a relative stranger, was more concerned for her well-being than her own family had ever been. Determined not to worry him further, she nodded.

“Yes, you’re right. I should eat something.”

“You had porridge for breakfast, so shall I prepare a regular meal for lunch? The doctor said it’s fine as long as it’s not too spicy.”

“Anything is fine. Whatever is easiest for you.”

“Then I’ll prepare a regular meal. I can have it brought to your cabin, or you can dine in the banquet hall upstairs. If you prefer to eat upstairs, I’ll ask the master as well—he usually eats there at this time.”

Lockwood hadn’t returned since he left at dawn.

“Locke… is he upstairs?”

“Yes, if you’d like to eat there, I’ll let him know. He’ll be happy to join you.”

“Could you ask him if I could join him?”

Georgiana decided to try to match his routine as much as possible.

“Of course, he’ll say yes.”

Despite Henry’s confidence, she remembered how cold Lockwood had been earlier and wondered if he might decline.

“But be aware, there will be others upstairs, so it might not be as comfortable. Still, it’s a long journey, so it wouldn’t hurt to make an acquaintance or two.”

Henry’s words made her think of Sarah.

She had planned to look for Sarah when she boarded the ship, but being bedridden for several days had prevented her from doing so.

Was Sarah looking for me? With her personality, it wouldn’t be surprising if Sarah had searched every cabin for me.

Then again, Sarah knew my real name. Wouldn’t she find it strange that I am now Juliana? Maybe it’s better not to look for her at all…

As her thoughts spiraled, she finally spoke, “Locke must have some acquaintances up there too.”

“That’s right.”

“I’m worried I might be a burden, or that I might make a mistake.”

“You won’t be a burden. In fact, I’m sure he’d prefer to have you with him. You’ll understand why when you get there. I’ll go speak to him now.”

“Alright, I’ll get ready too.”