Grace in Wonderland - Chapter 95

95. Spencer’s Portrait

“He seems like a better person than I expected.”

Charles Dodgson’s evaluation of Richard Spencer, the Young Earl, was unexpectedly generous. Grace widened her eyes in surprise at his words, which contrasted sharply with the grimace and ominous aura Dodgson had displayed in front of Richard, as if he were staring at a demon.

“Y-you didn’t dislike him?”

“I dislike the fact that he proposed to you, not the man himself.”

Charles Dodgson chuckled softly as he answered Grace’s question.

“And it seems there’s no need to worry about him.”

Richard Spencer was, as the rumors in Grentabridge suggested, a narcissist. The nickname originated from the strange behavior of him sitting by the water and gazing at his own reflection, but even without such actions, it was evident he was self-absorbed.

But wasn’t that just typical of nobles? And the higher their rank, the more so.

Charles Dodgson had no expectations regarding the nature of aristocrats. Those born into wealth and nobility naturally grew arrogant. It was the environment that shaped them that way.

However, that didn’t mean all nobles were irredeemable. Individual nature varied from person to person.

If innate factors accounted for 20% of a person’s character, then environmental factors accounted for 80%. And most people judged others based on that 80% because it was more visible. Humans live within a variety of contexts, and personal opinions inevitably influence assessments.

But Charles Dodgson believed the truly crucial part was the hidden 20%. Even when exposed to the same environment, people’s final personalities differed. This suggested that there was a profound essence, a core unshaped by circumstances.

For this reason, Dodgson did not want to criticize Richard Spencer’s self-centered nature. Annoying as it might be, it was the product of his environment and thus open to change.

Even if marble and granite are carved into the same shape, their intrinsic qualities remain unaltered. This inherent nature is the 20% that defines their essence.

It is impossible to turn granite into marble, which means this core nature cannot be reformed. This is why Charles Dodgson paid close attention to that 20%.

Mary Montague was the same way. Watching Richard’s behavior made Dodgson laugh quietly to himself. The image of Richard reminded him of a young Mary, sitting with an audacious and arrogant posture, staring straight at Anthony Montague, who was five years her senior, as she proposed to him.

Mary Spencer had confidently listed her dowry, the support the Spencer family would provide, and so on, in an attempt to secure a marriage proposal. But Anthony Montague had rejected her outright without a second thought. Even 14-year-old Charles Dodgson could tell Anthony harbored feelings for Mary, but he still drew a firm line.

It had been decades since Dodgson last witnessed someone proposing by listing assets. It had also been just as long since he’d seen someone flee, face beet red, after a failed proposal. Richard Spencer and Mary Montague—the nephew and aunt were so alike that one could easily mistake them for mother and son.

“Why did you refuse her?”

Unable to suppress his curiosity, Charles Dodgson had once followed Anthony and asked him this question. Anthony Montague’s answer had been puzzling to the young boy.

“Because I’m not good enough.”

Even after that, Mary Spencer persistently pursued Anthony Montague. She courted him, sometimes pleading, sometimes persuading. But each time, Anthony would respond, “It’s not possible.” He even considered marriage proposals from families of similar standing.

How Anthony Montague and Mary Spencer eventually succeeded in marrying remained a mystery to Charles Dodgson. He couldn’t understand why Anthony, who had repeated his refusals like a parrot, suddenly changed his mind.

What was certain, however, was that they were truly meant for each other. After marrying Anthony, Mary, now Mary Montague, softened the rigidity in her demeanor. She learned to bend and look down to help others.

Mary Montague’s involvement in supporting those in need through charity and philanthropy was influenced by Anthony. Even when they were financially strained before their marriage, Anthony had spent his modest savings to fund Charles Dodgson’s education.

Despite this, Mary remained a formidable woman. Whenever anyone dared to slander Anthony Montague, she would draw her metaphorical sword, ready to fight. How endearing it was to see Lord Montague admiring his lioness, rampaging as if she’d chase them to the ends of the earth to exact justice.

Perhaps that was why Richard Spencer didn’t seem so detestable. Dodgson had already witnessed one absurd proposal before. Moreover, he recognized that it wasn’t a fundamental flaw but rather ignorance born of environment.

In addition, he sensed that Richard Spencer, the Young Earl, was someone who would sacrifice himself to protect others, just like Mary Montague had.

“Why did you reject the proposal?”

Charles Dodgson wore a grave expression as he questioned Grace. Hesitating, she managed to force out a reply.

“B-because I’m not good enough.”

Yes. That response was strikingly similar. The past of Anthony Montague and the present of Grace Gurton shared an uncanny resemblance.

“Not good enough? I never raised you to feel inadequate. If the late Lady Montague heard this, she would be disappointed.”

Placing his hand over Grace’s, Dodgson asked again.

“W-well… You know. I-I have so many flaws… ones that c-can never be fixed.”

At her answer, Charles Dodgson let out a long sigh. He had entertained similar thoughts when Grace decided to go to Lydon. Even as recently as yesterday, those concerns lingered in his mind.

Yet despite her flaws, Richard Spencer had proposed to Grace Gurton. If anyone understood what marriage meant within the Spencer family, it was Charles Dodgson, who had maintained a connection with Mary Montague.

From a guardian’s perspective, there was no joy in a man proposing to a child he had raised like his own daughter. It was not something to celebrate unconditionally.

Still, Dodgson believed he understood. Though the proposal itself was clumsy and chaotic, though it came across as awkward and unsophisticated, it was the best way Richard Spencer knew how to express himself. Just as Mary Spencer had once carried herself with haughty pride while offering her all.

“T-that’s why I thought I shouldn’t stay by his side. I-I think I should be with someone more… like me. And I don’t think marriage is absolutely necessary anyway.”

“… Didn’t you like the Young Earl?”

Charles Dodgson’s question made Grace press her lips tightly together. It seemed she had a natural talent for failing to hide her feelings. Lady Mary Montague and Professor Charles Dodgson had both noticed her unrequited love for Richard Spencer.

“N-not anymore.”

Richard Spencer had proposed to Grace Gurton. Even as he placed documents on the table one by one, Grace hadn’t grasped what was happening.

Richard spread out the papers so their contents were clearly visible to Grace. Then, in his characteristic haughty tone, he began reading through the Spencer family’s wealth detailed in the documents.

The Spencer estate in Lydon, Blenheim Palace in Woodstock, the grand mansion in Althorp, the villa in Windermere… Beyond that, Grace couldn’t remember much. Unsure of why Richard was doing this, she sat dumbfounded, listening to what sounded like a boast disguised as an explanation.

After more than 30 minutes of this, Richard finally concluded, his expression satisfied. Raising his gaze to meet Grace’s, he spoke the most romantic words imaginable in the world’s stiffest tone.

“Let’s get married.”

Admittedly, at that moment, Grace Gurton’s heart raced as if it were running laps around the Earth. She had never, not even in her wildest dreams, imagined that the Richard Spencer would propose to her.

The thrill of her unrequited love, which she had tried so hard to suppress, surged up and reached the heavens. What would happen if she accepted Richard Spencer’s proposal?

But from the lofty height of fantasy, reality looked far less beautiful. There was no place for Grace Gurton amidst the immense power and wealth that Richard Spencer had laid out on the table.

To some, Richard Spencer might be lonely, cowardly, or even foolish. But could such qualities truly tarnish someone who possessed so much? To someone like him, those traits were hardly flaws at all.

For a fleeting moment, Grace dared to imagine herself worthy of him. The man who gazed at his reflection in the waters of Cherry Hinton seemed, for some reason, pitiable beyond the closed doors of his life.

Yet Grace stepped outside and closed the door. She only saw the front side of the door Richard Spencer presented—a fortune too vast to comprehend and the status that maintained it.

Her soaring emotions plummeted back to the ground. Shrinking into herself, Grace could only respond in this way:

“T-thank you for the kind offer, but I must decline.”