Attachment Knight - Chapter 15

Radem, with his mask lowered halfway, stared at me chewing on cake for a while, then shook his head.

“It’d be better if you kept wearing that mask.”

Honestly, I was aware of it too. From the moment I revealed even a bit of my face, people had been glancing this way. The Lachilea Circus was famous across the continent, so even with thick makeup during performances, I figured sharp-eyed people would recognize my face.

I gave up on the cake and just sipped my drink through a straw as I said, “Actually, I called you all the way here because there’s something important I need to talk about. It’s about time we have this conversation.”

About the real purpose of us holding hands.

Radem’s gaze changed. He pulled his mask down more deeply and waited for what I’d say next.

“There are two ways to leave the island. Either take a ship out like an ordinary visitor, or use one of the warps on the island.”

“The ships would be heavily inspected, so that leaves the warp portals.”

“There’s one each in the east, west, and north of the island.”

Warp portals are ancient magic. Originally, they were the exclusive domain of royalty and the highest-ranking nobles. After underground wizards with malicious intent used warps to summon monsters and devastate large parts of the continent, they were banned for a long time. Now they’re permitted only in the capital and major city hubs for convenience. Moreover, installing a warp requires imperial authorization, and operating one demands an enormous amount of magic power above a certain level, which makes them difficult to handle.

The fact that there are three of them on this island alone is undoubtedly illegal.

You could understand why the current emperor, Cardich IV, was so intent on cracking down on Don Pisano. At first, I’d wondered why he was so wary of a mere wizard on an island, but if that opponent could handle ancient black magic that once brought a great calamity to the continent, it would be a different matter.

“Can you gauge Don Pisano’s magic power?”

“He knows very old forbidden spells. Spatial trick magic, of course, and he’s also skilled in mental-type sorcery. For a man like that to fail to brainwash you, Radem, maybe you trained your mind extensively? Knights who’ve reached a certain level can block mental magic with aura too. Or else—”

Holy power.

The holy power called the force of the Goddess Libra of time and balance is said to have compatibility against all evil magic.

From what I knew, Radem had nothing to do with holy power, so I felt doubtful. It wasn’t something you could cultivate like aura. You had to be born with it. I glossed over it roughly.

“Or maybe you’re under the protection of someone special….”

“Which of the three warps should we target first?”

“The west was cut off a long time ago. It might be sealed. The east is hard to approach, so we should start with the north.”

“The north. You mean the monster forest?”

“The Spring of Omelas festival is coming up. During that time, the northern forest is opened as a safari. After the festival ends, it’s closed again. We can use that window. It won’t be easy. If we’re caught, there obviously won’t be a second chance.”

“….”

Radem fell silent. He wrapped both hands around the warm teacup. The handsome man’s face wavered on the light camel-colored surface. The look in his eyes as he watched me was strange.

“Don Pisano said I was the sacrifice he’d been searching for.”

“….”

“If it’s discovered that you’re helping me escape, what will happen to you?”

“Who knows?”

“No matter who you are, you won’t come out unharmed.”

“Then we just don’t get caught. Why start by assuming we will?”

“Why are you going this far to help me, Millie?”

“Because when we were kids—”

“You’ve changed. I’ve changed too. I don’t remember you. Even if what you’re saying is true, the feelings from back then won’t remain. There’s no reason for you to help me, risking your life.”

Then my mouth suddenly spat out words.

“I have them.”

“….”

“My memories with you, my feelings. They’re all still inside me.”

It was something that popped out like instinct before I could even think. Radem wasn’t the only one flustered. I was shaken and bewildered too. For a moment, my voice sounded too serious.

Ah, the doctor said it.

That if I don’t take my medicine on time, my habit of lying will get worse. That I could believe the fiction I blurt out as truth and sink into that world forever.

But the water was already spilled. I smiled as if nothing was wrong. I could feel Radem staring at me. I licked my lips. I craved something sweet.

“…At first I thought it was nonsense, but now I don’t know.”

At this point, it seems Radem is getting confused too. Good. I think it might be fine to live like this with him, believing the false world is real. People point fingers and say lies are bad, but it isn’t always like that. Isn’t it better to be happy, even if it’s an illusion, than to live soaked in an unhappy, sad reality?

Anyway, if he regains his past memories, it’ll be a problem, so I should make him take the medicine I stole from Grisha even more diligently.

But I don’t make things up every time.

“I didn’t have friends when I was little.”

This is 100% sincere.

“The kids who lived here were either trying to catch Don Pisano’s eye or struggling desperately to survive. Hating each other, envying each other, fighting was their work. I didn’t have any particular talent either, so I almost got disposed of, but just then, the instructor who was in charge of me trained me extremely harshly. Maybe they afraid they’d be punished if things went on like this.”

Radem’s expression darkened, as if he sensed that ‘training’ was absolutely not in a positive direction.

“She was prickly like a skinny rat, but she had a good eye. Radem, do you know how a ballet company operates?”

“I know it uses a patron system.”

“That’s right. A ballerina born into a poor family enters the company to make a living. The pay is low, but they give you food and a place to sleep. And you get patrons too.”

A patron supports the ballerina they designate, and in return buys a night.

“The Lachilea Circus Troupe isn’t much different. Everything runs that way.”

Back then, the instructor often starved me, and tightened my corset like they were about to break my ribs, making me maintain a slim waist and long, supple limbs. If my proper posture collapsed, the switch came down, and to force out extreme flexibility, they made me split my legs until it hurt.

They also taught me social etiquette and how to play poker. They made me learn a suitable way of speaking and how to distinguish types of high-end whiskey and cigarettes.

“If it weren’t for that person, I wouldn’t have made a name for myself in the troupe. Back then, I hated them so much I wanted to kill them, but thinking about it now, I’m grateful. I like dancing on stage. It was the first time I had the dream of becoming a great dancer, but back then I didn’t understand why I had to learn all those petty things instead of just dancing. If I’d known they were going to use me ‘that way’ and squeeze money out of patrons, I should’ve played along better.”

“….”

“I was stupid. I thought if I was just good at dancing, even the terrifying Don Pisano and the instructor who was never kind to me even once would look at me differently.”

Radem’s expression hardened stiffly.

“I still remember what that woman said. If all you have to use is your looks, then shouldn’t you at least polish that much?”

In the end, the instructor succeeded in turning the woman called ‘Millicent’ into a trophy admired by everyone. I didn’t know whether they recognized my potential from the start, or whether they tried to shape me according to Don Pisano’s tastes, but after that, I naturally caught Don’s eye. The instructor’s whereabouts afterward became unclear. There were only rumors that they’d left the island after receiving a large sum of money.

“You know, right? That the best patron here is Don Pisano.”

“….”

I laughed loudly and popped the chocolate decoration on top of the cake into my mouth.

“Thanks to that, I gained a lot of enemies too, but that just proves how outstanding I am, so I don’t mind. Sometimes it even feels good.”

I rose to the lead role in major performances and made the Lachilea Circus known across the entire continent.

“But that wasn’t all thanks to Don’s backing. I worked hard too. People spout nonsense like I have no skill and just cling to Don Pisano, that I sell my body for business. People who’ve never made an effort are always busy tearing down other people’s efforts.”

Feeling wronged, I scratched the table wildly with my nails.

“You’ll hurt yourself.”

Radem gently held my hand down. The fingers he held tickled.

Feeling awkward, I fidgeted with the teacup filled with black tea for no reason.

It feels like I talked too much for nothing. I was curious and suspicious about how he might see me. I shouldn’t have mentioned selling my body.

Just then, a dark shadow fell over the table.

“Does the cake suit your taste?”