A Mad Lady’s Confession - Chapter 10

His new bride was a full eight years younger than him. Of course, he’d heard that at some point, but it wasn’t the kind of information that stayed long in Matthias’s mind. The one year they’d spend together mattered far more than the number of years she’d lived.

In Lemren, after a debutante ball, one received the treatment of an adult at eighteen. So she’d already been a proper adult for quite some time, and an eight-year gap wasn’t unusual in Lemren.

Most of all, she was now the rightful mistress of the household and his wife. That meant there was nothing for him to feel troubled about. And yet, he felt a sting of shame.

His body was already fully hard with anticipation. He’d boasted earlier that he wasn’t starved enough to bite into an unripe apple, yet laughably, he had been expecting something.

From a woman eight years younger, wearing not a slip nightdress but an oversized linen one, who genuinely intended to become a “human hot water bottle” to warm the bed.

In the past, he’d enjoyed freedom and pleasure in moderation. The world labeled him a philanderer, a womanizer, but that was something only said by those who didn’t know Matthias Nielsen at all.

In truth, he had never lost control of his desires. He’d never chased after women on his own, nor was he the type of man who lifted a woman’s skirts indiscriminately.

He only had light relationships with women who stirred both his eyes and his interest. Nothing more and nothing less than adult amusement.

That was why he was always composed. And that composure had shattered now, in front of a clueless woman who didn’t even understand the true meaning of warming a bed. Shame lingered like scattered fragments.

He felt her round, green eyes watching him nervously, wondering if she’d made some mistake. The woman had done nothing wrong. He didn’t want this to become a scar. At the very least, he didn’t want that innocent woman to feel humiliated on a bed.

“No, my lady. I felt a rush of fatigue and got dizzy for a moment. The bed’s warm enough now, so why don’t you return to your room?”

“….”

He rose to sit up.

“I’ll escort you to your bedroom.”

“…You could just tell me how to go back.”

“….”

At the sound of her voice, he turned his head. Her emerald eyes were trembling violently.

“If I don’t know something, you can teach me. If I did something wrong—”

“You’ve done nothing wrong, my lady.”

“….”

“Remember just one thing starting tonight. No matter the situation, a woman never does anything wrong in bed. Understood?”

Matthias despised treating women as objects meant only to be enjoyed one-sidedly. At the very least, in bed, he believed both sides should share equal emotion and sensation. The more inexperienced a woman was, the more she needed to know this.

“I’ve received your intentions well tonight. That alone is enough for me—”

“Teach me. I want to know.”

“….”

“I want to understand what it means to warm the bed. If it really means… that… I’m not a complete fool who knows nothing. It’s just that….”

She bit her lower lip, as if unable to finish her sentence despite having more to say. Seeing her tightly pressed red lips strangely made him thirsty.

“Is it because I’ll have to remarry another man after a year?”

“….”

“O-of course, if I remain a virgin until then, my new husband would be pleased. But I’m fine with it. If you’re thinking about my remarriage—”

“How far do you want me to teach you?”

His suddenly darkened voice cut her off.

The woman sat with her hands folded neatly over the book on her chest, rambling on. Matthias had watched her with patience until now.

Convince her gently and send her out. A cold bath afterward would fix everything. That was how he’d intended to handle it.

However, the moment the woman spoke the words remarriage and new husband, he felt the last thin thread of his patience snap cleanly inside him.

Why? She would leave in a year anyway. She’d only said the obvious. And yet….

“Tell me what you already know. Only then will I know what to teach you.”

He hastily concluded that this was nothing more than a man’s instinctive possessiveness. Not because of the woman before him.

At his words, Eleanor hesitated. She certainly didn’t know that such hesitation only made the other person more impatient. But to Matthias, in this moment, she felt like a fox who knew how to toy with a man.

After thinking briefly, the woman lowered her eyes gently and pushed out her plump, red lips.

“….”

That was probably the extent of what she knew.

A simple kiss. Not even a real kiss, just their lips touching. An innocent gesture like something children would do.

And Matthias didn’t even like that kind of ticklish foreplay. He’d never shared lips with anyone. But… for a brief moment, he lowered his head as if bewitched.

Their lips pressed softly together. He didn’t use his tongue, didn’t lick, didn’t tease. It was only the plump, warm softness of her lips touching his.

The sensation and texture made the back of his head tighten. Like a man experiencing his first kiss. For someone as experienced as he was, it was an unfamiliar, strange feeling.

To give the woman, who was surely inexperienced and awkward, a moment to breathe, Matthias paused slightly. But impatience rose in him, and he covered her lips again.

His tongue slid between them, parting her lips.

“Hhngh….”

A wet sound, tangled with the friction, filled the quiet bedroom. When their tongues touched, the small body beneath him jolted. He slowly pulled away.

“…Is that really all you know?”

“…N-no. I….”

Eleanor was utterly flustered. The unfamiliar sensation overwhelmed her.

Since the childhood she spent in “that room,” she’d lived a life without friends, bullied through a brief stint in society. And among the people she’d met at the clinic, there was no one she could have shared such talk with.

So what Eleanor knew about the union between a man and a woman was nothing more than its dictionary definition.

“Tell me clearly. How far do you want to learn?”

When his voice, now subtly urgent, whispered close, Eleanor thought about the time she had left.

358 days. No, since midnight had already passed, she had 357 days left.

She didn’t want to waste them.

“…The bed’s still cold.”

“….”

“U-until the bed becomes warm—”

Before she could finish, his mouth captured hers again, devouring the remaining words. This time, he kissed her deeper, more boldly, entangling his tongue with hers.

Tilting his head slightly as he kissed her, his hand slid to her chest. Then he grabbed the book she’d held over her heart and threw it aside.

When Eleanor’s eyes followed the fallen book on the floor, he broke the kiss and murmured darkly, “Trust me. I guarantee you’ll find reading me more entertaining than reading that book. Don’t look away.”

With that warning, his lips pressed to hers again.

The soft, moist tongues rubbing and sucking against each other felt overwhelmingly intoxicating. When Eleanor tried to mimic his movements with her clumsy tongue, a low growl rumbled from the man’s throat.

A large hand touched her shoulder. He didn’t grab her chest or bottom or sex all at once. Instead, his hand slowly circled her small shoulder. The hand that slid down from her shoulder stroked her slender forearm, then her thin back.

He began only in places where a stranger’s touch wouldn’t shock her. His movements were slow, deliberate. He didn’t want to frighten her.

He briefly pulled his lips away and studied Eleanor’s expression. When he stroked near her waist, her small body flinched faintly. As if soothing her, he stroked even more gently, and then, very naturally, cupped her bottom in his hand.

When he lightly squeezed, the soft flesh shifted under his palm. As the woman’s eyes twitched, he pressed a light bird kiss to her lips again.

He maintained a restrained touch, but in truth, he felt as if he were going to die from the frustration. Even if the fabric was thin, the sensation of touching her through clothes wasn’t enough.

The way he usually did things—roughly, greedily—tempted him desperately. He licked the lips still damp with her saliva.

“I may be the one teaching you, but in bed, we’re equals. Do you understand what I mean?”

She hesitated for a moment, then nodded. He doubted she understood properly. He was about to add more explanation, then decided against it.

What he meant was simple: if he touched somewhere unpleasant, or if she disliked something or liked something, she should say so honestly. In bed, she and he were equal.

But Matthias overlooked one thing: the woman was a student with a knack for her own unique interpretations.

Just as he opened his mouth to speak again, the woman suddenly sat up and pulled down the strap of her nightdress.

The U-shaped neckline, gathered loosely with small folds, slipped down easily.

She slipped her arms out of the sleeves, hesitated briefly, glanced at him, then pushed the fabric down past her chest as if making a firm decision. In an instant, her white breasts were revealed.

Even under the dim bedroom lighting, they bounced lightly like milk pudding, full and soft. Matthias stared, momentarily speechless, at the small, berry-like peaks standing at their tips.

“You said we’re equals… so I should take off my top too, right…?”

Her trembling voice couldn’t hide her embarrassment. Her nipples quivered with her shyness.

Ha….

He dragged a hand down his face. He had intended to go slowly, step by step. One at a time. And before removing the last of her coverings, he made one final, very late confirmation.

“This is your last chance. Do you really want this?”

“…Yes. I want it.”

Only then did he finally rise.