A Butterfly Through the Mist - Side Story 7

“Nngh…”

Even though there was nothing left to release, Ilex continued to suck on her sensitive spot as if demanding more. Only after a long while did he finally straighten his back.

He lifted Tilia, who kept collapsing, and sat her atop his thighs.

“Ahk.”

Her crumbling body suddenly straightened like it had found its spine. And in truth, her condition wasn’t much different from that expression.

Something thick and hard was embedded like a harpoon in the most secret part of her body.

“Tilia.”

As Tilia squirmed from the sensation of being invaded so deeply, a man’s voice brushed her ear.

When she raised her dazed gaze, she saw Ilex’s firm jaw. At the same time she realized his lips were wet, a large hand cupped the back of her neck.

Ah. I don’t want to kiss right now…

Though she thought so inwardly, her languid, dulled body couldn’t dodge his lips.

His tongue, tasting faintly obscene, wandered throughout her mouth.

Kissing while still deeply joined was one of the acts he always insisted on during intimacy.

Maybe it was his way of trying to connect every part they could. That made it somewhat understandable, and yet, she couldn’t help but feel a tinge of irritation that he always did it right after licking her down there.

“Hnn…”

But even that irritation was washed away by the sticky saliva that passed between them. Though breathless and growing faint, Tilia did not let go of the arms wrapped around Ilex’s neck.

He didn’t pull away his now-even-wetter lips until Tilia’s breathing was so erratic she was about to pass out.

“Tilia.”

Ilex’s voice sounded drunk as he gently thrust his hips upward.

“I love you.”

That tender confession sent a small crack through Tilia’s dissolving rationality.

“I love you, Tilia.”

Still buried in her nape, he repeated the confession. Though she heard it every time they made love—and even occasionally during the day since their wedding six months ago—Tilia couldn’t suppress the startled tremble, like someone who had just missed a step on the stairs.

She realized she needed to respond at the moment Ilex’s thrusts began to intensify.

Hghk! Tilia tilted her head back, breathlessly mumbling as his shaft drove so deeply it overwhelmed her.

“Me… too…”

Though her voice was small enough to be drowned in the obscene sounds, Ilex didn’t miss a word. He let out a rough groan, having caught it all.

His thrusts, like they would pierce through her, grew more frenzied. As she felt the fully aroused man seize her breasts with his mouth, Tilia cried out with debauched moans.

Yet even in that night soaked in pleasure, Tilia never did say what she meant to after “me too.”

***

How did it come to this?

At a southern window seat in the Arkansis Ministry of Foreign Affairs’ main consulate office, Tilia sat in the sun-warmed spot, staring blankly at the cluttered desk before her.

Time had passed quickly, and the season was already deep into winter. But Tilia, who had quit her job before the chill took hold of the city and had planned to prepare for graduate school, remained fixed in place, like she had been nailed down.

What happened to us—how did things get like this…

A sigh answered before any words did. Tilia rubbed at her throbbing temples and thought back to half a year ago.

***

“Graduate school?”

Ilex had brought it up about six months after their wedding. It had been a modest affair for him, but to Tilia, it had felt extravagantly grand. For a time after that, Ilex had been entirely preoccupied with exploring every corner of the mansion with his new bride as an excuse for honeymoon passion. Only when her fury finally forced him to restrain himself did he start to moderate.

“What do you mean, graduate school? That’s out of nowhere.”

“It’s not out of nowhere. You’d be wasting that top Academy diploma otherwise.”

Ilex replied shamelessly, idly playing with strands of Tilia’s hair.

“The admissions schedule for the rhetoric master’s program is out. Exams are this fall.”

What’s that got to do with me? Her face clearly said as much, but Ilex simply seated her on his lap and went on about admission dates and selection processes.

First round was document review, second was a written test on the major, and the third round was interviews and oral exams, which would be evaluated using the answers written in the written test…

“Are you planning to apply to grad school?”

Unable to take it anymore, Tilia finally asked in confusion, and Ilex gave a quiet laugh.

“Why would I go there? No. It doesn’t suit me.”

“Then why are you bringing it up all of a sudden?”

“Not me. You should go.”

Far from resolving her confusion, his words only piled on more question marks.

Graduate school?

She too had been thinking about quitting her job soon.

Not because she felt compelled to take up the demure duties expected of a duchess. No, it was because she had grown tired of the secret favors and overwhelming interest from high-ranking officials that came knocking almost every day. She was planning to resign from her position as a foreign consulate officer.

But if someone asked her if that was the only reason she intended to resign—well.

She couldn’t deny that, deep down, the idea of preserving the dignity of the Duke of Davenport had crossed her mind.

Being a “duchess with a job” was already unconventional enough. And now, he was suggesting she leave her job and go to graduate school.

“…Are you serious?”

“Yeah.”

She asked doubtfully, and his reply was all too natural.

“It’d be a waste—your brain.”

Saying that, Ilex kissed her jet-black hair, the same hair he lovingly combed every night with perfumed oil.

At that level of sincerity, Tilia had to pause to figure out whether he meant her intelligence or her literal hair.

“Don’t you want to go?”

Perhaps thinking her silence stemmed from career concerns, Ilex looked into her eyes as he spoke. His eyes, the color of early morning mist, studied her carefully.

“…Yes.”

Realizing that the reflection in his beautiful irises was of her flushed face, Tilia hesitated slightly before being honest.

“I do want to go.”

Of course she did. The academy’s graduate program had been her secret wish—one so precious, she had hidden it even from herself.

At her bashful confession, Ilex smiled and kissed her round forehead.

I knew it. He whispered as if he’d expected it, but his face looked even more excited than his wife’s.

***

Preparation for the graduate entrance exam began that very day.

“You’re going to keep working at the Ministry?”

Arms full of rhetoric textbooks, Ilex frowned when Tilia said she wouldn’t submit her resignation until after the admissions results were out.

“You’re going to quit anyway once you get in. Why put yourself through the trouble?”

“I haven’t been accepted yet. And I have to work at least through this winter.”

“Why?”

“Because my severance pay increases then.”

In Arkansis, public servants with less than ten years of service received a lump-sum severance payment instead of a pension. The payout varied based on years of service, and the difference between over and under five years was significant.

“I have to stay until November to reach five years.”

“……”

“No way I’m giving that up.”

Ilex stared quietly at the determined face of the duchess, then leaned forward to meet her gaze.

“That’s strange. Didn’t I already share the Davenport estate’s financial records with you?”

“You shouldn’t look down on pocket money.”

“What good is more money sitting in here? It’ll just rot.”

“Gold doesn’t rot. It doesn’t corrode.”

“……”

“Same goes for bonds and railway construction rights.”

“…Can you even buy bonds or railway permits with severance pay?”

Hit dead-on, Tilia pursed her lips and glanced sideways at him. At her sharp glare, Ilex couldn’t help but chuckle and quickly tried to shift tactics.

“Don’t think about the money—just focus on studying. What’s the point of wealth earned at the cost of your health?”

“…It’s not about the money.”

“Then what?”

“I just want to receive that severance.”

Do you know how hard I worked to get that job? What I went through just to hang on there?

“I feel like I can’t really close that chapter until I get it.”

“……”

Though he kept a conflicted expression for a while, Ilex eventually raised the white flag in the face of his wife’s unwavering resolve.

“But if you start both and your health suffers, you have to quit right away. That’s non-negotiable.”

Only after securing a firm promise did Ilex finally set down the textbooks he’d brought.

They were new. Brand-new rhetoric texts, untouched by any hands.

Tilia’s eyes immediately lit up at the sight.

When was the last time I ever studied with brand-new books? Tracing that faint memory, she ran her fingers over the pristine covers that even smelled fresh.

“Six months left.”

But that precious moment shattered instantly with Ilex’s reminder.

“If you fail this time, we’ll aim for the fall semester…”

“No.”

Tilia cut him off firmly before he could even finish thinking aloud about the possibility of failure.

“There is no second try in my life.”

“……”

“Never before, and never again. Ever.”

And so began Ilex Davenport’s long days of involuntary celibacy.